Helping Tackle Your Kid's Mental Health with Lisa McIntyre
In this episode of the Kindling Project Podcast, Melissa Halpin sits down with Lisa McIntyre, a therapist, school board member, and advocate for youth mental health. They discuss Lisa's journey from her upbringing in Indiana to her current role in Northville, Michigan, where she actively supports mental health initiatives in schools and the community. The conversation explores the impact of technology on youth, the importance of community support, and strategies for maintaining mental health, including breath work. Lisa emphasizes the need for schools to provide mental health resources and the significance of inclusion for all students. The episode concludes with a call to action for listeners to engage in their communities and support mental health advocacy.
Support Lisa and her mission!
https://lisamcintyrenpsboard.com/
https://www.instagram.com/lisamcintyrenpsboard/
Listen to the full episode:
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Melissa Halpin (00:13)
Welcome back to the Kindling Project Today we're sitting down with someone who wears a lot of hats. Therapist, school board member, mom of three, and fierce advocate of mental health, Lisa McIntyre. Lisa's got such a cool story. She worked in major cities as a licensed clinical therapist and now she's deeply involved in the Northville community in which we both live with her work on the school board. We're going to talk about how she got here, why mental health is her mission.
and how she's leading with her. Welcome, Lisa.
Lisa McIntyre (00:43)
Thank you. I'm so excited to be here with you today, Melissa. So fun. What a nice introduction.
Melissa Halpin (00:45)
I was excited to hear you. know we... Yeah. Well, we've
known each other for a few years and I've been trying to get you on the podcast for a few months and I'm just excited that it's happening this morning.
Lisa McIntyre (00:56)
Yeah, same, same, same.
Melissa Halpin (00:58)
I know you're coming down from like a super busy week in our community. You went to a mom prom last night. Super fun.
Lisa McIntyre (01:01)
Yeah.
It was so fun.
We were there and it's kind funny to have our husbands drop us off, right? And be like, see you later. And we all, the moms, we were all talking about, what makes it so fun is that we don't have to worry about the guys who don't want to dance. We can just have fun as moms and just kind of let our hair down and let loose a little bit. And moms don't really get a chance to do that very often. So it was really fun.
Melissa Halpin (01:11)
No.
Hey, you're
No, I was thinking about it, I saw some of the pictures from our community like online last night and this morning and I was like, you know, prom might have been more fun for some of us in high school if we had gotten dropped off by our daddies.
Lisa McIntyre (01:39)
Totally.
Yeah, agreed, agreed. It was really fun. It was a great crowd and just, yeah, it just a really, it's a special event. And it's always a fundraiser for a particular charity. And this year it was for Kids Table, which is a great organization in Northville. So they, yeah, they have a food pantry in one of the schools.
Melissa Halpin (01:40)
Yeah. Yeah.
Okay, I haven't heard of that one, but.
Mm-hmm.
Okay. I love that. I love that. That our community has a lot of community advocacy and a lot of, you know, great charities. It's fun. Yeah. Well.
Lisa McIntyre (02:03)
and it's just, it's a really awesome thing.
Yeah, it's so fun. Yeah, it's great. And
I love, yeah, when some of these charities get started by moms.
Melissa Halpin (02:19)
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So there's quite a few women in our, the Kindling Project community who either have stated that their Kindling Project is running for office, which I know you've done, or starting a nonprofit, which I know both of you and I have been involved in a number of them. So that's another reason why I thought you'd be a great guest today. So.
Lisa McIntyre (02:30)
Yeah.
Thank you.
Melissa Halpin (02:39)
Let's get into your backstory a little bit. So I know you lived in a couple cities, I don't know if metro areas, but Chicago, Phoenix, now Detroit. Tell us a little bit about your journey to get here.
Lisa McIntyre (02:48)
Yeah.
Yeah, it's interesting. I grew up in Indiana and you know, I grew up in the town that my mom had grown up in and her mom had grown up in. And when I was exploring colleges, I could have gone to, you know, a really large university in Indiana, looked at a couple of those, but was kind of overwhelmed by that. So found I had a friend from high school who went to Kalamazoo college and she invited me up for a perspective weekend and I fell in love with the school.
Melissa Halpin (03:10)
Ooh.
Okay.
Lisa McIntyre (03:18)
It's such a cute campus. It's a small campus. There's like 1200 students. I think when I was there, that 1200 students total, my high school was about the size of Northville High School. had 2000 students, about 500 in my graduating class. So, I fell in love with the school and a couple of things I really liked about it was we had career development quarters, we had a senior project, and we also had a study abroad program. So, I went to Kalamazoo.
Melissa Halpin (03:33)
you
Lisa McIntyre (03:45)
I lived in Germany for a few months and for my senior project I lived in Chicago. So kind of got the taste of a big city and you know the opportunities there and what would be fun. So after and I was introduced to working with kids also at Kalamazoo. So as part of my my very first quarter at Kalamazoo I was taking a general site class and we were encouraged to do some type of volunteer work in the community.
Melissa Halpin (03:52)
Thank
Okay.
you
Lisa McIntyre (04:11)
So I chose to tutor a student who was at a very, it was a Title I school in Kalamazoo, pretty impoverished setting, and worked with this young girl who was struggling with schoolwork because she was feeling really sad. So kind of sparked my curiosity around how to support kids with mental health and how to connect that with schools.
Melissa Halpin (04:34)
And it's stuck with you all these years.
Lisa McIntyre (04:36)
Yeah, it has, it really has. And then my senior project, went to Chicago and I worked at a small residential school for youth. It's called the Sonia Schenckman Orthogenic School. They worked with a lot of troubled kids and I lived in residence. That's one of the really interesting things about that program is that as a, I think a TA, a teacher assistant, something like that for my three month program. And I lived in the school. So that was an
Melissa Halpin (04:38)
Yeah.
and
Lisa McIntyre (05:02)
I had just a, you know, like a dorm room off-site there, or on-site, which is kind of interesting to be in the same, you know, dining room for meals and things like that with the kids that live there.
Melissa Halpin (05:05)
Right, Right.
Yeah, it seems like that would be a good way to build trust. You know, that they get to know you and see you more and you're not just in and out. It's not just a job, right? It's part of your life.
Lisa McIntyre (05:16)
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, it is that opportunity to be a good role model and connect with kids and, you know, be available if somebody needed something. That obviously they had people that worked the different shifts to support the kids, but it was, like you said, it was, you know, the kids would see us all at consistent times. It was, was a really cool opportunity.
Melissa Halpin (05:40)
Well, it sounds like your commitment to youth mental health is decades long. What are you seeing now with kids and teens? How have things changed?
Lisa McIntyre (05:49)
gosh, you know, some of the problems are similar, right? That when families have had mental health issues, mental health struggles, if the parents have or grandparents have, some of those things get, you know, the dynamics, the family patterns, the communication style sometimes get passed on. And also definitely now seeing with schools and also with my own kids that smartphone use, technology use, social media has also really
ramped up anxiety and depression. You know, when we were growing up, a kid could pass a note in class and, you know, maybe make you feel bad in an instant or make you feel that rush of excitement, like, so and so wants to be my friend or, you know, we want to go out together. And now you think that those notes happen through a cell phone, right? Or through a social media page and comments and
you know, continuing to amplify. Yeah, it's and it's nonstop, you know, all day, all night can be. So seeing some of those struggles, how that impacts kids.
Melissa Halpin (06:41)
That's forever. Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, I've seen it with my kids too, and the addictive quality of it. I feel like it was different with my son than it was with my daughter, but both of them have had their own challenges. It's constantly like, put the phone down, it's summer, go outside.
Lisa McIntyre (07:10)
Yeah,
yeah, and when we were kids, right, kids could ride their bikes, they would meet up outside, they'd meet up at the local school, they'd meet up at a park. There was just a little bit different, I guess, sense of independence maybe or trust in the community that everything would be okay.
Melissa Halpin (07:18)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, I personally allowed my kids to have cell phones in middle school. So that was kind of like when you get to middle school, you can have a cell phone. And at that time, the kids thought that we were making them wait a long time. And in retrospect, now I wish I had waited until they were 16.
Lisa McIntyre (07:43)
Yeah, agreed. It's so interesting. I've got two older girls and now a middle schooler. And we did the Northville Public Schools had a social media night presentation sponsored by Northville Education Foundation and then also the PTAs, elementary PTAs. We did that on Thursday. It was a great presentation. It was for fifth graders through eighth graders. And I brought my son.
Melissa Halpin (07:50)
Mm-hmm.
Lisa McIntyre (08:09)
And it was just a really good opportunity to talk about, you know, why do people want social media? Why do kids want cell phones? And same as you, my older two got their first smartphones when they were in middle school. And my son now only has a smartwatch. He's not going to be getting a smartphone probably at least until the end of eighth grade. So it is later. Most of his friends already have a smartphone and
Melissa Halpin (08:16)
Right. Right.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Lisa McIntyre (08:36)
whether
or not parents allow social media is one piece of it, but certainly smartphones are not, it takes a lot of effort to make sure that it's a safe tool for kids. Even as adults sometimes we struggle with when do I turn off my phone and you know.
Melissa Halpin (08:39)
night.
absolutely. I
don't know if you've seen that where it gives you like the tracking of how many hours you spent in the different apps and I'm always shocked because I think that I don't, I'm not in those apps as much as I am but it adds up.
It adds up if you're 13 days a day, right? And it doesn't even have to be social media apps. I know with my son, for example, it can be games, or it can be he's big into my fitness pal, like tracking his water and his food and his macros and his exercise. And it seems like a healthy thing in the beginning, but then you're like, you don't have to check this thing 19 times a day and enter every single calorie. You're 16, right?
Lisa McIntyre (09:03)
Yeah, it does.
Yeah.
Yeah, I know it kind of gamifies all those things that...
Melissa Halpin (09:30)
So, the technology itself,
it does. The technology itself can be addictive even without the social media aspect of it.
Lisa McIntyre (09:39)
Yes, agreed. And I think that when, you know, kids are, you know, it's easy to form those addictions. Some people, you know, can put some boundaries up and be okay and not have that dopamine hit, but addiction is a dopamine hit, right? So when that notification, you know, pings us and we look at it or we enter the information, like, okay, I feel good. It's that surge of dopamine, that feel good hormone that...
Melissa Halpin (09:44)
Yeah.
Yeah.
Lisa McIntyre (10:04)
kind of triggers
that reward center in our brain and it's hard to reset that. It's possible but...
Melissa Halpin (10:09)
Yeah, it's work. So what role do you think schools need to play in supporting mental health?
Lisa McIntyre (10:15)
I think it's, yeah, it has to be hand in glove, you know, working with parents and schools so that, you know, early identification might happen when kids are struggling, that sometimes a school might see things that a parent doesn't see, just based on, you know, kids want to look good for their parents and sometimes they're a little bit more real when they're not at home. You know, sometimes it's the reverse can be true also, but I think that
Melissa Halpin (10:39)
Yeah.
Lisa McIntyre (10:40)
to have those services available in school, whether it's a support group. Obviously school counselors play such a crucial role and it's hard. We've asked teachers to do a lot more than just teach because if a kid is depressed or anxious in class, it's really hard for them to pay attention to the material that's being presented by the teacher. And I think we're also seeing that trend that sometimes
Maybe parents aren't quite sure how to intervene or how to teach those coping skills to their kids. If they didn't learn it themselves, that it's pretty hard to teach something if you don't know how to do that yourself.
Melissa Halpin (11:12)
Yeah.
Exactly. didn't have that same experience. This generation of kids is, they're the first, right? Tell us a little bit more about Northville Cares for Youth
Lisa McIntyre (11:26)
Gosh, Northville Youth Network is a phenomenal program here in Northville and the Northville Cares for Youth is kind of a, it's grown over the years that I've been on the school board. I made it onto the school board in 2021 and the community partnerships that have grown out of Northville Cares are just really impressive through the police department, the library, some mental health programs around just our local area.
working with, yeah, so many different providers and just continuing to grow that because not all the services can be provided at school. Parents are asking for those resources, asking for counseling opportunities or some of the other things that Northfield Cares has done are offering like stress management workshops. It's just a way to kind of identify what are some of the needs and how do we meet those needs.
It's New Hope Center for Grief Support is one of the partners. It's just, it's a really great way to provide some community wraparound support for people at all stages of, you know, any type of struggle. And some of it could also be fun things, right? That the Unity Skate Park is part of that. And yeah, it's just, it's a really great, it's a really great outgrowth from how do we meet kids' needs.
Melissa Halpin (12:34)
Right. Yeah.
Yeah, I love it. Is it modeled after another community initiative or is it something that we're sharing with other communities that other communities can model for themselves?
Lisa McIntyre (12:52)
Yeah, definitely something that, you know, I think that we are so lucky in Northville. We have an incredible executive director of special services, Beth Santer. She's worked in a couple of other school districts and what she is doing in Northville is just, it's just really incredible that she's kind of had this vision of how do we, how do we continue to build this Northville Cares for Youth in partnership with Northville Youth Network. So I'm not really aware of any other communities that are doing anything.
to this degree. So I do hope that other communities will see North Hill as a model for that, because it's really awesome.
Melissa Halpin (13:25)
Yeah, I think so. You've led the district through some pretty challenging times. Pandemic, social unrest, funding issues. What's been the most rewarding and what's been the hardest?
Lisa McIntyre (13:30)
Yeah.
I think the most rewarding piece for me has to witness the inclusion week that has grown. I remember early on, we moved to Northville in 2013. We moved here from Phoenix. Our family's from Michigan. So, you know, we love living out in the desert, but thought, okay, let's move back to, let's move back so the grandparents can be involved in.
you know, walking around Northville, taking my kids to story time at the library, noticing, you know, that we have some Northville serves the act 18 population through cook school. So those are our kids that have significant disabilities. And when I first moved here, I was so curious. It seemed as if while those students were being served, it also seemed that the community wasn't necessarily aware.
that that was happening there was a little bit of invisibility around that it seemed. And so maybe even some discomfort from people, Even some discomfort that there were kids in our community that that were you know needing some additional support. And it seems like we've really started to turn a corner with how do we support all students that the inclusion week and seeing the way that we.
Melissa Halpin (14:27)
Yep.
Great.
Yeah.
Lisa McIntyre (14:48)
focus that at the high school level, middle school level, and now also starting with the elementary level. It's just, it's so phenomenal because when our kids with disabilities are included, everybody can find a space. Every student in Northville schools can have, you know, that sense of belonging, which is critical for success.
Melissa Halpin (15:05)
Did you get any community pushback on that?
Lisa McIntyre (15:07)
We didn't. I'm so glad about that, right? That there were some worries, right? With some change in the federal administration that, you know, how does that change what we can do for these kids? And we're so grateful that this year it seemed like the community really came out in support. We have an incredible teacher who is leading that charge, Kelsey McKitchick, and it's just awesome to see how she's really inspired all of the levels in our district to
Melissa Halpin (15:09)
Good.
Lisa McIntyre (15:34)
to just embrace this process.
Yeah, it's awesome.
Melissa Halpin (15:37)
Well,
yeah, it really is. It makes me proud of our community. And I know, I personally have friends who work in other districts where they have different models. So I didn't really know too much about the Cook School model. I'm just aware that it was there. So it's nice to hear that there's some more integration going on between the different school communities. Seems important to me. Yeah.
Lisa McIntyre (15:56)
Yeah, yeah, it's great. And
the unified program, it's awesome to go watch. I don't know if you've ever seen any of those games, but our middle school, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's so fun, right? To see them go compete with other schools and other communities and just build those connections. It's just really an awesome thing. And I think it really prepares
Melissa Halpin (16:06)
My son's been involved with that, yeah.
Lisa McIntyre (16:20)
all students, in particular our Northville students who are such a special community. And sometimes it feels like we're kind of in a bubble. So it's great for our students to be able to go interact with people in other communities, just to have that opportunity just to see the world beyond Northville.
Melissa Halpin (16:26)
Right.
Yeah. Yeah. Well, I really appreciate your service to our community. And I feel like your commitment to youth mental health is like so important, of course, and so timely with what all of us have been through these last few years and what it looks like the next few years are going to be like. I think we just need to have continued advocacy for special populations, whether it's mental health, whether it's disabled, what have you. So.
Lisa McIntyre (17:01)
Yeah, agreed.
Melissa Halpin (17:01)
I just really
want to thank you for that work. I know there's a lot of women in our community who want to do that work. seeing you out there making that commitment, running for school board, I know I had a small part in the last school board campaign. And just that insight showed me how much work and effort it really is. So.
Lisa McIntyre (17:16)
Yeah.
Melissa Halpin (17:20)
kind of curious just as a person how are you balancing this life as a psychotherapist, as a school board vice president, as a mom of three, as you know as my sister in midlife like this isn't the only time that any of us are having that I can tell so how are you doing all of this how are you showing up when it gets hard?
Lisa McIntyre (17:40)
Yeah, it's, you know, I was at home with my kids for so many years doing a lot of volunteer work. So yeah, I wonder if maybe I have a reserve that I wasn't as depleted, right, as sometimes people are once they hit midlife. I think it was also, you know, I've done a lot of my own personal growth work to be at a place where I can be really grounded and centered and
Melissa Halpin (17:49)
Yeah, you rest it up.
Lisa McIntyre (18:05)
So I sometimes say no to things or, you know, if I want to stay, you know, we had a mixer with our local dem club the other night and I really wanted to stay for longer and connect with different members of the community. And I also had this commitment with my son to go to the social media presentation. So sometimes it's dividing my time and, you know, not being able to do something for the full time. Trying to keep my family in the center, right, supporting them first.
Melissa Halpin (18:08)
you
Lisa McIntyre (18:30)
I have a super supportive husband. really lucky there that I think he gets it that this time is my time to have an impact and, you know, share my gifts with our community. We're lucky to be able to, you know, that I can do this, right? That he's got a flexible job too that allows us that kind of grace. What else? I've learned this really new, cool,
technique too called breath work. It's Wim Hof is one method, but it's a really cool way to kind of reset your nervous system and just bring some calm and kind of release some of those stressors. So that has been helping me. You know, I try to balance sleep. It's really important. My coffee, I have tried to curb some of my social media consumption and really connect with people that are
Yeah, are energy adders in my life rather than energy detractors?
Melissa Halpin (19:24)
That's so important, right? It's so important to curate the people in your lives, to be those that feed you, that get you, that fill your cup, all of that. Yeah, I've had to do some of that too and it's hard. It's not easy.
Lisa McIntyre (19:25)
Yeah. Yeah.
No, it's not. The world can be sad, right? That some friends of mine lost their son in a tragic accident last October. watching them go through that process, it's also the reminder that life is short and I don't want to take it for granted, right? So making sure that I spend time with my family, that I connect with my mom, that I connect with my in-laws and...
Melissa Halpin (19:42)
Right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Lisa McIntyre (20:01)
Make sure, you know, spend a little time with my kids too, doing something fun, not just barking at them to please clean up their room.
Melissa Halpin (20:07)
Yeah,
yeah, I went to a concert last week with Elise and it's just such a good reminder that we're transitioning to like adult relationships with these people we raised and the only way adult relationships work is that if you're motivated to do it because it's fun. Like it's not necessarily my job at 20 now to solve all of our problems.
Lisa McIntyre (20:25)
Yes, exactly, yes.
Melissa Halpin (20:33)
just to sit there and bear witness and enjoy the same things.
Lisa McIntyre (20:38)
Yeah,
it's so funny at MomProm last night, there was a woman that had her mom with her and the moms that I was with, we were like, I couldn't imagine bringing my mom just because I don't think my mom would enjoy the loud music and the dancing. But then I thought, gosh, wouldn't it be fun to have my kids come to MomProm with me someday? That would be really cool to do something like that that's fun. So I love hearing that you went to a concert with Elise, it counts, right? It matters.
Melissa Halpin (20:59)
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah. Sometimes it counts more than you think. Those are actually the positive memories. I think, I'm sure as a therapist, you've heard, or maybe you know this stat better than me, but I've heard this sort of statistic that for every negative thing, you need three or four or five positive things to balance it out.
Lisa McIntyre (21:21)
Yeah, it's more like
seven positive things.
Melissa Halpin (21:22)
seven. so yeah, so it's
really important that, you know, I mean, you can't get through raising somebody without some conflict, but to balance that out, right, with really easy.
Lisa McIntyre (21:32)
Right. Yeah, for sure. And I think, you know,
research also shows that kids need just one caring adult in their life who really loves and cherishes them so that they can, you know, for them to be successful in dealing with whatever is on their life plate. And so I think, gosh, I want to be, I want my kids to have more than one person, but for sure I want to be one of those people for my kids.
Melissa Halpin (21:41)
me.
Yeah.
Me too.
Yeah,
yeah, me too. So I guess going back a little bit to grounding, grounding with your kids, but also grounding yourself. Tell me a little bit more about the breath.
Lisa McIntyre (22:06)
Yeah, the breath work is very interesting. My sister-in-law invited me to come join her for this. And so it's basically active breath work and it's kind, you you lay down, it's on a yoga mat and it's really concentrating on taking some deep breaths into your belly and then so belly, chest, and then an exhale. And it's very active for, the one session I did was active breath work for like 25 minutes. So it's,
It's very interesting and it really kind of takes you, it's kind of an altered consciousness experience. might kind of describe it like that, that it kind of allows different, you know, emotions or memories or things that are kind of bubbling kind of in your subconscious area that kind of brings it to the surface. So it happens to be that a training that we had at the place I work, Reset Brain and Body.
We had a training this past Tuesday for all of the staff and we did breath work there too. like the universe is giving me this as a gift that life is challenging right now that there's some political wind shifting that we're not really sure how funding is going to happen for public schools. And, but I, and I want to be able to keep serving and leading and with heart and also with wisdom. And I think it's hard to do that when you're feeling anxious and kind of
Melissa Halpin (23:19)
Yeah.
Lisa McIntyre (23:23)
disconnected inside your body to be a good leader. So yeah, it allowed me to kind of release some grief maybe too around this isn't the world I imagined my teenagers launching into adulthood in a place where there's just a lot of tension between adults and political parties and confusion and stress and anxiety and...
Melissa Halpin (23:43)
Yeah. Well, I'm really glad to hear that you're doing it and that the team at Reset is doing it, because I do feel like that's something that needs to pass down to all of us. I could use it. I know my kids could use it, and I agree. It's related to the stress on our nervous systems, our culture, our society, the political environment we're in.
Lisa McIntyre (23:44)
So yeah, the breath work.
Melissa Halpin (24:05)
our mental health status. It's like, I feel like it's, you know, we all were just barely recovered from the pandemic before there was another huge political turmoil. yeah, navigating that. Any tools, any tools that you can offer us to get through it, I'll take them.
Lisa McIntyre (24:13)
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, even something as simple as like doing, you know, an inhale that takes a few, you know, a count to four and then holding your breath for a count of four and then kind of a long exhale for the count of four can be really grounding. And to do a couple cycles of that, I find myself, you know, noticing, my shoulders are shrugs. I'm like, okay, breath in and then just really like releasing that, right? So that I can be in my body and
Melissa Halpin (24:37)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
Lisa McIntyre (24:51)
and notice, okay, what am I, how can I make good decisions if I'm frantic? It doesn't work for me.
Melissa Halpin (24:58)
No, no, it doesn't work for me either. Although I must say I feel like a big part of every day is, okay, take a deep breath, onto the next thing. Try to focus, yeah. Yeah. And I don't know, that's just not, it just doesn't feel sustainable to live like this, holding your breath. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it isn't, right? It's causing collateral damage for all of us.
Lisa McIntyre (25:06)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yep.
Right. It doesn't. It isn't. Yeah.
Yeah, it was interesting in the, gosh, I don't remember the statistics, but the trainer that came to our meeting talked about how you can go without food for, three days. You could go without water for, what would it be, a day, but to go without breath for four minutes, like you're right? So, I mean, it's...
Melissa Halpin (25:39)
I think we're always pushing
it though. I think we're pushing it, like holding our breath, especially those of us that are stressed and anxious. We're probably nudging close to it a lot.
Lisa McIntyre (25:49)
Yeah, and I think when we are stressed and anxious, we're breathing, you know, just on our chest and that belly breath. If we could really use our bellies to breathe really helps us get that full oxygen experience and just really calms our nervous system down. It sends that message like, okay, I'm fine. I'm breathing. I am okay.
Melissa Halpin (25:53)
Yeah.
Do you have any other tips you want to share with us besides breath work for getting through these difficult times?
Lisa McIntyre (26:12)
Yeah, I think, you know, it's tempting to tune out the news, right? Or it's tempting to only read like one side of the news or watch one side of the news. And I think for me, I found like my passion projects really are education and mental health. And so I try to tune in to that particular topic and even hearing things, different perspectives that make me uncomfortable.
Melissa Halpin (26:27)
Right.
Yeah.
Lisa McIntyre (26:36)
I think it's important to allow myself to be uncomfortable for a little bit, right? To sit with that for a little bit and then, okay, but not marinate in it, right? Take a break from it. And I've also, really been working hard on going to bed every night at the same time and not scrolling on my phone, just really turning it, you know, turning everything off. I set my Do Not Disturb. It starts at 9.45 every night.
Melissa Halpin (27:03)
Yeah.
Lisa McIntyre (27:04)
And so sleep is such a big part of it too. And then drinking my water.
Melissa Halpin (27:09)
Yeah,
yeah. It's funny, I was in another kind of a roundtable conversation with women the other day and everybody had to list one thing that they're doing for themselves. And my dear girlfriend said she's drinking her water. And everybody was like, come on. Like that wasn't enough. But we got into a whole conversation about it. Well, that's really a lot. Just drinking all your water.
Lisa McIntyre (27:20)
I love it.
Yeah?
Melissa Halpin (27:32)
To be dehydrated is associated with a host of problems that we, just something so simple. And then also that satisfaction of checking it off your list. I did do one thing for myself that I could manage. I could manage drinking my water.
Lisa McIntyre (27:46)
100%. Yes. Well, and I
think too that, you know, like when my kids were little, I remember like, and we lived in Arizona for, you know, a big chunk of that time. You have to hydrate there for sure. Otherwise you just are really miserable. But it also forces you to take a break, right? That like when you're drinking your water, you also have to get up and use the restroom. So it makes you take a break from whatever you're doing too. So that's also, I think.
Melissa Halpin (27:58)
Yeah.
Lisa McIntyre (28:12)
You you get up and you stretch your legs and you walk around and like both of those things I think are helpful for us that and for me, I like cold water that also calms your vagus nerve and your nervous system. It's it's a hack. It's useful.
Melissa Halpin (28:26)
okay.
I didn't know that. love cool. I like everything ice too. Yeah. Well, we talk a lot on this podcast about midlife reinvention, second acts, like showing up when it's hard. I think that you're modeling a lot of that. But what's next for you?
Lisa McIntyre (28:29)
Yeah, yep.
I don't know. It's interesting. know, I just got reelected to the school board and the term is a four year term. And, you know, it's interesting. I always, you know, I worked with you. Your support was amazing. I also worked with a group called Vote Mama. you know, when you, I know as women, often say like moms are the problem solvers, right? Like in my family, my husband works hard. He is an amazing dad.
Melissa Halpin (28:48)
Mm-hmm.
Lisa McIntyre (29:08)
He does not know what pediatrician my kids go to, not for any fault of his own, just he doesn't have the same flexibility that I have to take the kids to the doctor or whatever. And some families do have that, right? Some families, the dad is the person who does the dentist visits and the doctor visits. And I feel like with a lot of my mom friends though, we know that women understand like what's at play. And so...
Melissa Halpin (29:33)
right.
Lisa McIntyre (29:35)
I don't know, kind of playing around with a couple different ideas. I don't know if it would be like a move to a state leadership position. I've really enjoyed, I love being part of the school board. I love working with other advocates in our community, whether it's our township people or our city people. I mean, we have some really incredible leaders in Northville. was really awesome yesterday for the state of community just to see like what's coming ahead for Northville.
So yeah, kind of playing around with, I don't know, as my kids are grown, you know, my older two are in college and figuring out what they want to do for their, you know, what they want to do, who they want to be. My son, he'll be in eighth grade next year. And I know that high school, you know, that goes fast. Right? Yeah.
Melissa Halpin (30:18)
It goes fast, miles into the sophomore already. Like,
I don't know, we're halfway done.
I wanted to say that it's really reassuring to me to know good people in different levels of public office.
And I feel like the fact that you're out in the community and a lot of us know you, it's like a sigh of relief when you see other women that you share values with being of service. And I know you and I are, you know, we're kind of political junkies and we follow the news and we support different candidates and I've had the...
you know, the pleasure of meeting several Michigan elected representatives from the governor to the representatives, the senators to school board members. And in this time of uncertainty and turmoil,
Lisa McIntyre (30:54)
Mm-hmm.
Melissa Halpin (31:01)
Just knowing that a few of your representatives are people you've seen, that you trust, that you share values with, that is soothing. That is sort of relieving on the level of stress of like, okay, it's not all crazy people. There's a lot of good people trying to do good work.
Lisa McIntyre (31:16)
Yeah,
and they're people, right? To your point, like we're all people. Yes.
Melissa Halpin (31:18)
And they're just humans. They're families, right? They're people and
they're mothers and they're fathers and they're family members and community members. And it's just important to remember. And I think it's also important to say, if you can do it, others can do it. Like if there's a woman listening today who wants to serve in public office, it is attainable. It's a lot of work, but it's attainable. And we need good people.
Lisa McIntyre (31:33)
Yes.
Yeah,
totally. I agree. And finding a team, right? Like finding a team and asking for help that I think sometimes as moms, sometimes we just do it all ourselves, right? Often, often we do, right? We're like, I can, I got this. I'll figure it out. It'll be fine. and sometimes when I hear my daughter who's away at school say, well, I'll just figure it out, mom. I'll just figure it out. I'm like, wait, wait, no, it's okay to ask for help. Right? I think I learned that during my first four years in office, like I have to ask for help. I really can't do it by myself.
Melissa Halpin (31:47)
Yep. Yeah.
Right, often.
Right.
Right.
Lisa McIntyre (32:12)
And people want to help. For me, when I ran for school board the first time, Matt Kolazar is our state rep and his wife, Kim Bush, was super helpful for me. Just like I would ask her various different questions. I didn't know her and I was super grateful that she was willing to just like, you know, on a moment's notice, like walk me through some things. And then she also introduced me to other women who could help. So I had some great support my first go around and.
Melissa Halpin (32:25)
Yeah.
Lisa McIntyre (32:36)
And it was in the middle of a pandemic and I really never imagined myself running for office. And for me, my why was my kids, all three of my kids wanting to make sure that they were getting what they needed in our public school setting and knowing that if I was worried as, you know, a pretty privileged person that my kids might not get what they need, what are other people struggling with and how do we lead through that to make sure our kids land in a good place?
Melissa Halpin (32:42)
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, it really takes a whole village. It really does. Yeah, we can't do it alone. And...
I don't think we're supposed to. I really don't think we're supposed to. I think we get very isolated in our sort of nuclear family situations, and we think we're supposed to do it alone. But I don't think that's natural for humans.
Lisa McIntyre (33:14)
I agree.
I agree. I know my neighbor used to say when the boys were young, she's like, I just want to live in a commune because sometimes like, you know, just a communal space where people like, you know, one, one person takes the Monday dinner preparation day and another person takes the Tuesday and that we all, know, the kids could just like run around on this commune. And I loved, I loved the idea of it, right? That when I was growing up, my grandparents, we would see them every Sunday.
Melissa Halpin (33:47)
Me too.
Lisa McIntyre (33:51)
either we would go to their house or they would come to my house. And, you know, I remember my parents, they'd play cards, we'd have like a root beer float. It was, it was fun. It was always that like something, you know, something that we'd look forward to. But I also think it probably helped my parents a little bit that it was, you know, something to do that didn't cost money. And it was just, it was that connection. So when I lived in Arizona, we had two other families that we would do Sunday dinner with.
Melissa Halpin (33:59)
Yeah, you're right.
Lisa McIntyre (34:17)
and we would rotate houses. And it was so fun. The kids loved playing. It was time for the parents just to, you know, kind of take that deep breath before the work week.
Melissa Halpin (34:26)
Yeah, we had that when we lived in California. We had a supper club with a couple other families and Yeah, those are happy memories and I also my grandparents lived next door to me when I was growing up so similar
Lisa McIntyre (34:37)
I love that.
Melissa Halpin (34:37)
I just really want to thank you for just sharing about your heart and your commitment to mental health and to youth today. Talking about leadership and running for office. I think these are super important and interesting conversations for our audience. Where can folks learn more about your work or get involved in supporting youth mental health?
Lisa McIntyre (34:56)
gosh, yeah, that's a great question. So many ways, definitely through Northfield Schools. I have a website, lisamackintyrenpsboard.com. That's a good website. Someone amazing helped me create that and get it up to snuff. And you can find me at Reset. I'm at Reset a couple days a week and...
Melissa Halpin (35:05)
Okay. Yeah, I don't know something about it.
Lisa McIntyre (35:15)
through the Northville Public Schools. Anybody can also email npsboe at northvilleschools.com. That is, I think it's dot com. Hopefully it's not dot org.
Melissa Halpin (35:24)
one of those, it'll come up. I can put all the links in the show notes for you as well. Yeah. Well, if you love this conversation, please share it with a friend, rate the show, leave us a review, and of course, check out Lisa's mental health advocacy online. We'll put all of her information in the show notes. Thanks, Lisa.
Lisa McIntyre (35:30)
Yeah.
Thank you. Thank you so much, Melissa. I appreciate you and everything you're doing just to amplify women's voices and to bring so many cool people to the table. And you're, you're a leader in your own way. And I'm so grateful to know you and appreciate your support and just love to see kind of how you spark that kindling and just spread that joy in the world. It's amazing.
Melissa Halpin (36:02)
I those kind words. It's my form of service, my act of service, really. I love it. Yeah.
Lisa McIntyre (36:07)
Yeah, yeah,
it shows. It's so necessary too that, to your point, that sometimes we feel kind of isolated and aren't quite sure how to find like-minded people and this is a great way to do it.
Melissa Halpin (36:16)
Yeah,
yeah, yeah. And I think the biggest message is both of us took a step out there into what we were envisioning. And it does happen. It unfolds in front of you if you ask for help, if you get clear and you state what you were looking to do.
Yeah, I'm glad we shared that.
Lisa McIntyre (36:35)
But yeah, I agree. It's like we find our wisdom, right? We kind of dig deep and we just, you know, just walk through it. It's a good thing.
Melissa Halpin (36:42)
Well, you can also find Lisa in our online community, the Kindling Project Ignite. have a private Facebook group and we'll be sharing some clips from this podcast in there and until next time.
Lisa McIntyre (36:53)
Awesome, thank you.