Navigating your path through entrepreneurship and grief
Embarking on your kindling project is an exciting journey filled with countless opportunities. As the doors of opportunity swing open and shut, trust your instincts to guide you toward the ones that truly resonate with you.
Learn from entrepreneur Yolanda Williams about the challenges she faced in starting her business, CREAM BLENDS, and how saying "no" and embracing change led to personal and professional growth. A must-listen for all aspiring entrepreneurs!
In this episode, you'll hear
Transforming pain to purpose
Starting small, being flexible and nimble
Prioritizing mental health over financial success
Cream Blends https://creamblends.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/creamblends/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/creamblends/
Yolanda's book, Sorry For Your Loss But What Happened?
Listen to the full episode:
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Yolanda Williams [00:00:00]:
Another kindling that I've been using recently is you can change your mind. You could be 60 years old, still tryin' to figure out what you wanna be when you get older. You know, like after the kids, after being a wife, or whatever. Like, what do you wanna be when you grow up, and I think sometimes we think, I'm too old. I can't become a lawyer. And my thing is, yes, you can.
Monica [00:00:25]:
Are you ready to spark the flame of creativity? Welcome to the Kindling Project podcast Where women come together to share, inspire, and grow, giving us insight into the people and processes that help them bring their kindling project to fruition. I'm Mick, and I'm joined by my cohost, Firestarter and friend, Mel. Together, we want to ignite your inner spark And help bring your passion projects to life by creating spaces to empower and support you. We're so glad you're here. Let's jump in. Hi, everyone. Welcome to the Kindling Project podcast. This is Mick.
Monica [00:01:02]:
Okay, peeps. I never get that excited about my guests because I really do talk to so many women. But, Yolanda Williams, I have been craving for you girls since I watched you receive that award at the scene event back in March, I think.
Yolanda Williams [00:01:16]:
Yeah.
Monica [00:01:17]:
It was a really wonderful event where they were honoring entrepreneurs. You were one of 7 or 8, I believe. But to me, you stuck out the most because of your beautiful story. So you are the CEO and co owner of Creme Blends, which I love by the way, In natural skincare company. You also are the co director of Distinct Life brand developing agency. It's definitely a family biz. You are doing it with your bestie, hubby, love of your life, your college sweetheart, Rick, Which is a beautiful story in itself, but I wanna go back a little bit here. Give me a little bit background of your childhood.
Monica [00:01:55]:
What was going on?
Yolanda Williams [00:01:57]:
Oh, so, childhood. So, I grew up, you know, I'm from Detroit. So, born and raised in Detroit. I am the oldest of 2. I had 2 brothers and came from a single family, single mom. And one thing that I tell people, I just was talking to someone yesterday. I It's a Pistons game and I ran into this guy that I went to high school with and one of the things he said was, like, you've always been who you are now. Like, even when we were in 4th, 5th grade and this person that I ran into, we went to elementary, we went to middle school, high school, and college together.
Yolanda Williams [00:02:34]:
So to even hear that because a lot of times you forget, you know, what you were like or you have this perception in your mind of, okay, this is what I was like as a child. But like they say, your brand is what other people say it is, not what you say it is. So, to hear that, you know, it just always confirms that person that shows up today was the same kid that showed up back then. I'm just more confident. I'm more in tune with who I am, unapologetically who I am. I think my childhood is one of the things that shaped that.
Monica [00:03:04]:
And now what did you study when you went off to college?
Yolanda Williams [00:03:09]:
So in college, I went to Oakland University, and my degree is in English. And I also have a master's degree in education, curriculum and instruction. So, writing, teaching, developing curriculums, has all kind of spilled into what I do now with Distinct Life, with Cream Blends. Writing is a big part of, you know, a business. So, in the beginning, when I was doing it, a lot of people were like you know, I had family members that, you know, were engineers, computer science and all that. They're like, what are you gonna do with English? You're gonna be broke, you know? Or you can teach.
Monica [00:03:46]:
Right.
Yolanda Williams [00:03:47]:
Like, teachers aren't the most important people in our lives where they literally shape all of us into, you know, eventually who we're gonna be. So, yes. So English and education was my educational background.
Monica [00:04:00]:
Okay. Now, you mentioned your brothers and your childhood and I I just realized I didn't know this about you that you wrote a book.
Yolanda Williams [00:04:08]:
I did. Yeah. I wrote a memoir just talking about my experience with grief. So, I grew up with 2 brothers. I am the oldest and they are both deceased. One died in 2015. And then, my 2nd brother was killed in 2016 in Atlanta, Georgia. So, as the oldest sister, you just don't see your younger siblings not being here.
Yolanda Williams [00:04:29]:
And you're like, I'm the big sister. I, you know, I do everything first. So, in this case, that wasn't the case. So, I did write a memoir about it and released it when I turned 40. It explores my experienced with grief, and it talks about bringing the conversation of life back into the conversation on grief. And grief is teaching me more than just pain. And so that's one of the things that I kinda focused on within the context of the book. And a lot of people are like, Yeah, it really like, I expected it to just be about one thing or about grief, but it was so much more.
Monica [00:05:02]:
Oh, I'm gonna definitely have to get that book. It's called Sorry For Your Loss.
Yolanda Williams [00:05:06]:
But what happened?
Monica [00:05:08]:
Yeah. And tell tell me something. How did you get through that? And can you just share a little bit about your Lowest point and then when you were able to flip it into creating a book and maybe helping others go through it?
Yolanda Williams [00:05:20]:
So, the first loss happened in 2015, than 2016. By 2016, within the book there, I talk about this show Survivor that I watch. And it's a series Instead of people go and they're competing against each other to survive, like, in the wilderness or whatever, so there's something that you can win, call it, like an immunity which means you're safe at the next elimination. So within the book, I talk about, I felt like with in 2015, We have the immunity idol now because you're like, This is my brother. They both were 30, which is also strange when they passed away a year apart because they were only like a year apart from each other, a year or 2 apart from each other. And I felt like we had the immunity idol because you're like, God wouldn't do this to a 2nd time and life doesn't work that way. It was a long journey. I didn't start off like grief is teaching me more than just pain and, You know, we'll get through it.
Yolanda Williams [00:06:16]:
Like, you're really devastated. It literally is the most devastating thing that I've ever went through. And then, watching my mother go through it Twice has been heart wrenching. So, I found a grief group for her. But it can't be just any grief group because, you know, you're dealing with people that their parents are older and they've died from cancer, old age, or heart disease. Homicide is, It's a different level of grief, especially when you're not a fan like, my brothers weren't gang members or involved in selling drugs or anything. It literally was 2 random occurrences in 2 different states. So, we found a group where everyone in the group, their loved ones, die in a similar way.
Yolanda Williams [00:06:59]:
So, after finding the grief group, we did that for several years. And within the group, I remember the day when I just It was like, okay, you're done. They didn't do anything wrong. I just knew I had got to a place where I could hear no more stories. And I had to move forward or I would get stuck, not only in my grief, but now I am through what has happened, you be develop this kind of hypervigilance, post traumatic stress, and so if you're hearing other people's stories all the time, you're really kinda showing up in the world, feeling like, What's gonna happen? Now it's time. I developed a friendship with a lot of people in the group. My mom did as well. But then, I moved on.
Yolanda Williams [00:07:37]:
And I decided that I had to try to, you know, individually deal with the grief on my own. So, I started seeing a therapist, which literally change my life. And then through that therapy is when I decided to start writing a book and developing the bare bones of what the outline and everything would be, and that 2020 hit, and I was sitting. Everybody was sitting. I wasn't shipping out any product. I wasn't making any product. All my employees were at home. And then, I said, well, this might be the perfect time to start writing that book to give me something to focus on in the middle.
Yolanda Williams [00:08:12]:
It was tragedy even when 2020, when, you know, the pandemic hit and it was so much going on. I just literally just went inward and start at the process of the book. So I was doing therapy in the book, writing each chapter, reading it to my family. And it took about 2 years for me to get to to the end of things. And I'm happy that, you know, I did. But in the process, I had no idea what it was gonna turn into.
Monica [00:08:38]:
That's incredible story. There's so many elements and so many layers and my heart breaks for you and your mother, but I'm also so proud of you of the healing that you took. My sister, we lost our nephew to an overdose and she too discovered the beauty in pain, if you will. To your point, like, you can either simmer in that and get caught up in all the stories because there's a lot of ugliness in the world. And to sort of rise above it and see, well, How do I make it count for something? Because it was not for nothing. Their lives were not for nothing, and and how you flip that and now are hoping Empower others get through grief. It's a beautiful thing. So I'm sure they're looking from above and just so proud of you.
Yolanda Williams [00:09:20]:
They are. Yeah. There were 2 dogs that keep showing up at my house, like, the other day. So I open my door and they're literally right, like, they're right there. You know, I called not to get them captured but to let the family know, okay, these dogs are roaming the neighborhood. And then, like, 2 days later, they were back on my porch. And I just told my family. I was like, I think those are my 2 brothers in spirit just, you know, just visiting to to make sure that this is okay.
Yolanda Williams [00:09:46]:
But, yes, there's beauty in grief. It literally rips your heart out, but it shows you how to show up in the world differently, and I do honestly feel like, not that I'm better than anyone, but I feel like I show up differently. There's a level of compassion and empathy and you know that you don't have as much time as you thought to repair relationships, to go after your dreams. And that Fueled me to where it's like, go for it. You don't have time to just ponder and, you know, and think about things for 10 years. And you're like, Look, no, I'm gonna get started today. Even if my book isn't a New York Times bestseller, even if I don't have the best editor, we do things on our own to get messages out, to encourage other people instead of waiting. And I think grief has just showed me how to just keep going and try to figure it out as fast as you can to help others while you're here.
Monica [00:10:40]:
It's so true. That resonates with me deeply because I really have flipped the narrative of my life too because of my nephew. And it's like, oh, no. I get too. I get to live this life and nothing becomes a burden that way. It's like, no. It's a privilege, and we're here. So what are you gonna do with it? What brand? What what stamp are you looking to live in life? Tell me about your business and how it's evolved.
Yolanda Williams [00:11:01]:
I started Creme Blends. I'll start with their first. So Creme Blends, I started in 2013 in our home kitchen. So we were already an entrepreneurship household. My husband was the owner of Burnt Rubber, which is a sneaker boutique that he started in 2007. Before Burrell Rubber, we had a screen printing business in our town home that we lived in right after college. And we started printing t shirts and stuff for different companies. Oakland University was actually our very first client.
Yolanda Williams [00:11:29]:
Had no idea what we were doing. But In 2013, I started just experimenting with natural skincare products in the house. So soaps, body butters, Candles were added kinda later, but it started off with soaps, body butters, oils, and, like, exfoliating scrubs. I would just start giving them to people to get their feedback. They loved it. We did that for like maybe 4 or 5 months of just testing and seeing, you know, how does it work? How long does it last? Does it turn to mold in 4 months or through 5 months. So, we did a lot of testing to figure it out. And then, in December is when I launched the website, and then people started ordering and everything.
Yolanda Williams [00:12:09]:
And then by February, I was already in a meeting with Whole Foods, they were meeting with local Michigan supplier. Showed them the product. One thing that I think that helped us was the fact that Rick was already really good at branding and design, so we designed the labels the best we and they've gotten better over the years. We love the ingredients that you put in. I wasn't using any preservatives or stabilizers or any of that because I didn't even know know about that and I'm like, I just wanna have it as close to a natural product as possible. They loved it and then within, like, 2 months after that meeting, we were in the the Ann Arbor Whole Foods, and then it went to Troy, and then Detroit opened, and then East Lansing. And we did that for about over, like, 5 years. We were in Whole Foods, and then we took it out and just decided to sell exclusively online direct to consumer, and then we had a pop up in Royal Oak at the old building where Burnt Rubber first started and they had moved on to another location.
Yolanda Williams [00:13:10]:
So, Rick went and asked them, like, Hey, my wife, you know, my wife and I started a skincare company. We just wanna do, like, a pop up for a year. And, of course, she said, Okay. Did the Pop up for a year, it went really well, and then we pulled everything out and then just went online. And so that was, like, in 20 from 20, like, 18 to 19.
Monica [00:13:29]:
Okay. So I'm sorry. I have to interrupt because getting into Whole Foods is No small feat. I mean, they have layers of layers. I used to be in the food industry, and just getting product in there is very difficult. Right? They have a very high standard. So how is it that a woman who decides, I'm gonna get into this, and you didn't intend to be a natural company, you just that's what you developed? Or were you intentionally trying to do, like, an organic natural product?
Yolanda Williams [00:13:56]:
Yeah. So we were intentionally trying to do that. So I never research like, I just knew that One of the things that I started looking into more once we got into Hochul was how companies add stabilizers and things to their products because it needs longer shelf life. So you don't wanna have a product that only lasts 2 years and you're in millions of stores and then now the product has expired and you have to get it off the shelves or whatever. So I was like, well, I don't think I wanna do that. I wanna just focus on it being natural, which is there's a gift and a curse with that. But that's what the customer loved. They loved the fact that it was a product that didn't have any of that in it.
Yolanda Williams [00:14:35]:
Once we started shipping during the summer and, okay, sometimes the product melts. You know, added a weather disclaimer on my site saying that, Hey, it melts. You just refrigerate it. It'll solidify, but we slow down in the summer. And I was like, I'm okay with that. I think what's really helped us is I'm not just chasing after just, like, money. I like the freedom of entrepreneurship and everything. So for us, it wasn't like we gotta make the most money possible, as quickly as we can.
Yolanda Williams [00:15:05]:
It was like this is something that I enjoy doing and just went from there.
Monica [00:15:09]:
And you weren't afraid to learn and grow as you went. You weren't waiting for that perfect product to be I mean, you were actually doing q and a product development as you it was also in distribution. I believe in this product. These people believe in this product. I'm going for it, and I'm gonna learn as I navigate through this, which is, I think, really important for entrepreneurs or women who wanna business, but don't wait for all the parts and pieces to be ready. Sometimes you just have to lean in.
Yolanda Williams [00:15:37]:
I used to meet so many people and they're like, I am coming out with this, but I'm waiting for my website to be built. I'm waiting for this. I'm waiting for and it's like, just get started. And I tried to find the quickest way to do that, and then you develop and you evolve and you get the right people on your team. But if you don't have anything to really show anyone, they don't really know how to jump in to help you. If I start a website just with a basic Shopify template or whatever, over the years, you'll meet you meet people that are like, hey, I'm a web designer. I wanna help you, you know, make it, you know, more user friendly or So, as the years develop, we add it on and then you get better. And, I didn't wanna just wait until I had all of my ducks in a row.
Yolanda Williams [00:16:17]:
I was still working for in 2 years. So 2013, I started. 2015, I quit my corporate job, and we just did business full time.
Monica [00:16:25]:
And you went from a vendor at Whole Foods who, in essence, Through distributors to then you went to retail yourself where you had your own storefront, and then you eliminate that and now and really now our e Commerce. You really are direct to the consumer. That story has evolved because you really wanted to get closer to your End user?
Yolanda Williams [00:16:46]:
Yeah. Like, I feel like Whole Foods was really good in the beginning. It helps, you know, bring validity to the brand. It helps get your name out there. And then, even telling the customers that were shopping with us directly, like, there were some that were buying from Whole Foods, but many were buying online because Whole Foods wasn't ordering like, crazy amounts. It really, for me, was like, this is like an advertising marketing cost of saying that, you know, we're in Whole Foods. You can add it to your website and all of that to show customers that, hey, our ingredients, our products have been tested and validated by the number 1 natural food market, in the world. I'm not sure if that's still the case now.
Yolanda Williams [00:17:23]:
But, you know, back then, Whole Foods was pretty big. So I wanted to just be in control over our brand story free in narrative. Because I felt like with Whole Foods or with any store, whether it's Target or wherever, You don't own the customer. They do. So there's no way for me to email the customers that came in on a random Tuesday and bought the product. When they open the jar, was it full? Was it halfway down? Like, how did it look on the shelf? So for 5 years of people who bought from Whole Foods, I don't know who those customers are. And a lot of times, they don't know who I am. So, Whole Foods makes it so that, like, if you have products in their store, they want you to come and do, like, demos where you stand in the store and talk about your product and everything.
Yolanda Williams [00:18:10]:
And there literally were people within, like, year 2 that would come up to me and say, Yeah, I've been buying this brand for, you know, for years. And I'm like, well, thank you. And they're like, you work for the company? Like, no, I'm the owner. And they're like, oh, really? They've never been to our website, nothing. So, they Really, we're shopping with Whole Foods, not cream blend. They found a great product that they like in Whole Foods. So, I was like, I just wanna move Slower, I wanna be in more control. And I've kinda That's kinda been my goal since then.
Yolanda Williams [00:18:41]:
Like, I've been approached by Meijer and Walmart and Target and we're just like, definitely no for Walmart. But with Target, it definitely was a, like, not right, you know, not right now. Because a lot of times, if you're not prepared and ready, those types of things can also bankrupt your company as well. They don't pay you upfront for, if you get into a 100 stores or 200 stores. You have to be able to fulfill those orders. You have to make sure all the products get there in 1 piece and with the same quality that it would when you were making small batches. So I just was like, no. I just I don't wanna pursue that right now.
Monica [00:19:17]:
That makes so much sense to me. Now, you have a 4,000 square foot manufacturing facility now?
Yolanda Williams [00:19:23]:
Yeah. So we had that for like 6 years. We recently just moved everything out. It's a storage.
Monica [00:19:28]:
Okay.
Yolanda Williams [00:19:29]:
We're still shipping out and stuff, but my next move is the only building that I'm gonna be in, I'm gonna and own it. I don't wanna lease anymore. We had great landlords and everything since 2007 with Burn Rubber. Burn Rubber moved from one location to 2 more locations. Greenblends, we had the pop up there, so we were paying rent there. We had our manufacturing facility, we paying there. And then, Rick and I just, within the last year, were like just reevaluating where we were. We're getting older, kids are getting older.
Yolanda Williams [00:19:58]:
Things are just changing. My son will be going to college in 2 years. So I was like, you know what? We're tired of just paying leases. Entrepreneurship, sometimes you can find yourself on the hamster wheel. You're moving, you're speaking, you're making money, but how do I get off This wheel, you know, when I wanna pivot or do something different. And, so, our next focus is real state. You know, we're still making products and, you know, it's shipping out to the same capacity. It's just that I just got rid of the building and moved it into several storage units, and, you know, we're kinda figuring it.
Yolanda Williams [00:20:32]:
But that's within the last couple months. But we were there for about 7 years.
Monica [00:20:36]:
Okay. It just sounds to me like What makes you successful is that you are very nimble and that you're always thinking from a perspective of how do I run the business on your terms? Like it's always about controlling everything as much as you can understanding that ultimately your flexibility. I think you've said that more than once and your freedom is what you value the most and being available to your children and your your husband and you're building multiple brands. How is parenting, by the way, as you build a business? How talk to me as a woman. How how do you balance all of that?
Yolanda Williams [00:21:12]:
That's something that I'm still figuring out every single day because there are days where I'm like, okay, I have this under control. Like, this day went really well. And then there are other days where you're like, this is a lot, trying to, you know, talk to customers and speak and do podcast interviews in the middle of homeschooling. And It can be a lot, but I just find ways like, I'm very transparent with with my children on everything so they know what our next move is. Even before we moved our building, like when you sat down with our kids and explained what we were doing. Our kids are very much a part of our story. We sit down and talk to them just like we would business partners because they're our partners. And I have to let them know what's goin I let them know what's going on in business, with their education.
Yolanda Williams [00:21:56]:
They understand Greek. They are different kids than a kid that's never experienced loss of both of their uncles. So the balance of it is just being transparent and being honest and asking for what you need instead of expecting everyone to show up for you because they they just should. And sometimes as women, that can be a challenge. Even in marriage, you're like, You should just know. Haven't you been watching? Like, we think a little different, but then through talking to my therapist and everything, they're like, just ask. Tell people what you want.
Monica [00:22:28]:
So that's been really helpful to you in your marriage and with your children and in business. That's just in general.
Yolanda Williams [00:22:33]:
Yeah. Telling your kids, mom needs 2 hours of quiet. I'm gonna rest or I'm working on something. I need 2 solid hours. Do not chase the dog. Just ask them. I think sometimes People look at children like they can't handle anything. You know? We don't take them to things.
Yolanda Williams [00:22:49]:
We don't explain because they're young, and you're like, they're not gonna understand. They understand more than we think.
Monica [00:22:55]:
Did you homeschool both your kids?
Yolanda Williams [00:22:57]:
I did. So well, not homeschool. So one of them is after 2020, he was going to high school, So, he didn't do his middle school graduation or anything because the pandemic hit. So then, he liked it. He liked being virtual and doing this. And so, I was like, Okay, let's look into a program for you to where you can keep doing school and just be virtual. So he's in a regular public School is just that he does everything online. That's my oldest.
Yolanda Williams [00:23:23]:
He's in 11th grade. My youngest has been fully homeschooled. After 2020, he was fully homeschooled. But I have a master's degree in education. So I already knew about developing curriculum, how to help him, how to make sure he's taking his standardized tests. So I just, If they're taking NWEA for, you know, that month or whatever, Mason would take it too. I just would pay for it individually, so I would pay for whatever test they were taking to make sure that when he does go back to school, that he was set.
Monica [00:23:55]:
You added a whole new element of work for yourself, but it was important to you to do this.
Yolanda Williams [00:24:00]:
Yeah. When 2020 hit, we had already been talking about homeschool because, again, flexibility and freedom. Like, I wanted to just I didn't want our lives to just evolve around a school schedule. We did have the privilege of being able to do that. I know the average household parents aren't able to just not go to work and just homeschool their kid. So this was something we were already talking about. So when the pandemic hit, it just kinda pushed me. Like, hey.
Yolanda Williams [00:24:26]:
Let's give it a try. If it works, it works. If it doesn't, we'll go back. Like, I just wanted flexibility.
Monica [00:24:31]:
That's awesome. I love that approach, and I think that you're really gonna be putting out some amazing human beings out there in the world Because they just get it, and they're getting a real good lesson on entrepreneurship too.
Yolanda Williams [00:24:44]:
Yeah. Last day, you guys have the best classmates. Like Rick and I are your classmates. We're pretty cool.
Monica [00:24:50]:
Is that when you say I need a 2 hour break, guys? When it's like you're working together, you're Educating together. You're living together. You're praying together. It's a lot of loving together.
Yolanda Williams [00:25:00]:
Yes. And you need breaks and you need balance. There are times when we we're having conversations and I have to say, like, I just need my husband. I don't need you. I don't need my business partner. My kids may have the sadness need my mom, not my teacher. So evaluating yourself. You know how in corporate America, like when I worked in corporate America, they would do, you know, these kind of like every couple of months check-in with the employees.
Yolanda Williams [00:25:23]:
And I think sometimes as parents, as husband and wife, as business partners, as friends, as daughters, That you have to self reflect and see in the areas where you're doing well and the areas where you need improvement. And sometimes I have to go to my kid and say, Mom didn't show up in the best way possible. I was tired. And I should have started with the fact that I was tired so that we can both be aware of what is going on? And I and you apologize. I grew up at a time parents weren't apologizing. So, for us, just balancing everything is just taking breaks, ending the day early. There are literally times where I'm like, Day's over. And they're like, Mom, it's 12.
Yolanda Williams [00:26:02]:
Noon. Day's over. It's over. You're not here. I'm not here mentally. So, we'll do a movie in the middle of the day or the week, you know? Like, so we, I just really love just the flexibility of it. We're not here long enough on Earth to be miserable in every single thing that we do. So if it's something that's not working, I'll end it before I let it ruin my family or my kid being in therapy years later, talking about how their parent was never mentally or emotionally available.
Monica [00:26:35]:
Yeah. I mean, so many things you just said that I wanna unpack. First of all, the apologizing to your children is massive. It's it's a groundbreaking. We need to do it more. I agree with you. Ice I apologize all the time. And it changes the relationship because you own it.
Yolanda Williams [00:26:49]:
And I don't know where the narrative came of, like, kids being, you know, like, these silent partners. They can't contribute to conversations. I told my son today, like, there are some 11 year olds in different time periods where they were working. I don't think much has changed mentally. I think it's just what we perpetuate and push. And the narrative in our houses that everyone is a contributor. We all show up in different ways, but we don't have a silent partner. Like, kids are sight to be seen and not heard.
Yolanda Williams [00:27:18]:
You know, like, I don't I don't like that.
Monica [00:27:20]:
I love that. And when you said, like, we're closing for business. It's noon. I don't care. We're sold out. I think you were sort of mentioning about product, that sometimes you just need to take a wellness day. Sometimes you've gotta be able to get in a position where you're controlling your business and where it doesn't for you. And can you share a little bit about that? Because I think that's a really important message.
Yolanda Williams [00:27:40]:
Yeah. So, I at the Sine event, I was talking about this thing I do where when I'm overwhelmed, I literally put every product as sold out. And I said sold out on purpose because I need a week of just focusing on me or my kids or I'm like, okay. We're gonna do I'll go on vacation. I don't want emails from customers that are like, when is my order gonna ship? And they just ordered yesterday. You know, like that pressure sometimes. So, I just literally turn the faucet off. But I've given myself time to rest and recoup because we're humans.
Yolanda Williams [00:28:10]:
So, If I'm tired, the customer may not even be being rude. Customers email all the time without saying, good morning. Hello. They're like, where's my order?
Monica [00:28:19]:
Wow. Okay. No pleasantries at all?
Yolanda Williams [00:28:22]:
No. Nothing. Just I'm like, who raised you? I would do the sold out and you're not closing. I feel like a lot of businesses close because of burnout because they're just going and going and going and going. I just spoke at this event. The lady who invited me was a lawyer. She just was saying how she gets burned. Even with Take, she was like, I took on 2 more clients.
Yolanda Williams [00:28:41]:
I knew that I was already burned out. So then you get to the end where a lot of entrepreneurs, not a lot, but, you know, many people who you think like, oh, they're doing business. She has stores all over the world. And then they commit suicide. So, before I ever Monica, get to that point, I will end all of the like, As long as I can eat, my house is paid for, I'm gonna have shelter, food. I will be happy just living off bare minimum before I sacrifice by my mental health.
Monica [00:29:13]:
That's so massive. And it's also so empowering, but it's also brave and it's scary, right, as an entrepreneur. Oh my gosh. If I Turn it off. Will I lose clients? Will I lose this?
Yolanda Williams [00:29:22]:
You will. I tell people all the time, it's wild over here on this side. When I decide to shut things down and I'm like, I might be turning down 20, 30 grand, and I've been okay with it. So I live modestly. I'm not living above my means because I value freedom. I know that at the end of the day, I wanna be able to afford my lifestyle if I decide, if nothing was working. If sales were low, if a client leaves, I want Rick and I to be able to be okay to still put food on this on the table healthy food on the table.
Monica [00:29:53]:
You just really understand your why. And knowing your why really makes it really easy to make decisions. There's so many, like, kindlings that I hear you talking about from, like, Running your business on your own terms, the importance of saying no, controlling your brand, your story, also multiple streams of income is so important for you because you're not Relying on just 1 brand, can you add any more kindlings to our fire here?
Yolanda Williams [00:30:19]:
Another kindling that I've been using recently is you can change your mind. You could be 60 years old still trying to figure out what you want to be when you get older. You know, like, after the kids, after being a wife or whatever. Like, what do you wanna be when you grow up? And I think sometimes we think, I'm too old. I can't become a lawyer. And my thing is, yes, you can. You literally can go to medical school if you wanted to at any age. You know what I'm saying? It may be Harder because you have family and kids and all of that.
Yolanda Williams [00:30:49]:
But I think this narrative of I'm in this box. I started off as a lawyer. I gotta stay here because that's what they know me as. But You can change your mind. And so, recently, I've been just focusing on writing. I'm working on my 1st script. I registered for the New York and got into the New York Film Academy to actually start learning about script writing and working on screenplays or TV and something I'm adding to the fire is you can change your mind.
Monica [00:31:16]:
It's such an important one. Why not us? We're still in here. We're still in the game. So, okay, I'm thinking about all the businesses that you're in and What really stands you out from an outsider's perspective. Right? You're transparent with your labels. You're transparent with the way you do business. You're transparent with the way you Parent, you're transparent with your loss and the pain in your life. All these things make you so authentic.
Monica [00:31:41]:
And that's why I think you radiate so much where people are drawn to you. It seems to me that not one of your products It's really about the whole thing. Like, you're just planting all these seeds, but it's really to empower and teach and love and give back to others. You've always been this way, like, of service?
Yolanda Williams [00:32:03]:
Always. I tell people all the time, it's bigger than body butter. It wasn't the body butter. I didn't wake up like, oh my god. I'm so passionate about, you know, making skincare product. I loved it, but it's about freedom. It's always been about freedom. It's always been about making people feel comfortable.
Yolanda Williams [00:32:19]:
I like the fact, Monica, that when I meet people, they share things of a personal nature because they feel comfortable with me. I want people to feel safe to where you don't have to show up, you know, dressed up face full of makeup For me, you literally can come to my house and wear, like, sitting with our hoodies on and joggy pants. The fact that my friends, my children feel safe because there are so many people when you're like, man, like, they seem so happy. But then they committed suicide. They just did a TikTok video dancing, but they committed Suicide. Because we don't feel safe with sharing that I'm not doing well right now. You know how many times, especially as women, we, you know, I got it, I got, you know, we are handling everything and we're not really showing up. Honestly, like, letting people know either I'm not okay, I need help.
Yolanda Williams [00:33:09]:
So, I've always been that person to where people have felt like they could share and know that whatever they share would be, you know, safe. It happens literally, Monica, like, everywhere I go.
Monica [00:33:20]:
For real. Like, you're showing up like you really care. Like, some people ask, like, how are you? Can I help let me know I can help you and then the other person says, okay? Yeah. Can you do x, y, or z? And they're like, no. It was just I was just really asking. I don't really wanna help you. I don't really wanna do anything.
Yolanda Williams [00:33:36]:
Just a formality.
Monica [00:33:37]:
Yeah. It's an empty gesture. I don't really wanna do anything for you. And it sounds to me like you come in really honestly with someone. We just had part of the kindling project, we're doing these she talks series where they're smaller in in format. And yesterday, we had a really compelling conversation around mental health, specifically with young adults and the rise of suicidal thoughts and self harm and anxiety And all these things that our young people are facing, right, our children. And these women just the breakdown of the tears that went on in this room Of women who just were holding it in so long trying to pretend that everything was okay to your point is too much. I mean, No wonder these women or men all of us as human beings don't allow ourselves to open up enough.
Monica [00:34:23]:
And maybe we all need to do a better job is just saying, Hey, how are you? Like, really, how are you?
Yolanda Williams [00:34:28]:
Yeah, and we don't do that enough because I feel like there's so much narrative around, you know? Like, I'm a boss woman. I'm handling this. And so, I can't break down. I can't let people know that I have days where I struggle. I like people that show up, like, your kid's doing something funny but you didn't move everything off the counter. Like, because I have stuff on the counter. You know, some days, It's crazy in in the kitchen. So yeah.
Yolanda Williams [00:34:51]:
So that's my thing now is I like people with stuff on their counter.
Monica [00:34:55]:
You like the messy? Because We have we have spent too much time curating these perfect moments. And I actually write a blog. It's called to get her joy, and it's about discovering your joy as a woman, but There's a lot of messy in there. And then betweens, that's where we that's where really where the the meat of it is.
Yolanda Williams [00:35:13]:
Yeah. It is. Yeah. So I just think if we focus more on just being real, we can develop these real converse have these real conversations of not being okay because it's kinda hard to tell if your counter's always clean.
Monica [00:35:26]:
So true. So I love it. So thank you so much for your continued messaging, your joy. I love everything you're doing, and it sounds like you are moving and just growing and building bigger and better things and still Spreading a message of empowering others too.
Yolanda Williams [00:35:41]:
Yeah. And you as well. Thanks for inviting me.
Monica [00:35:45]:
You got it. Anytime. Okay. Bye. Thanks for tuning in. Wanna help us keep the fire going? Share this episode, give us a rating, and subscribe for more awesome content. Also, want access to lots of freebies to fuel your passion project? Well, head over to our website and sign up for the weekly emails. And finally, we'd love for you to join our community at the Kindling Project Ignite Facebook group.
Monica [00:36:12]:
Until next time, keep stoking the fire.